Walking Through Ireland

Picture this: you, a sprightly adventurer with a penchant for soggy weather and rugged landscapes, flipping through the pages of Walking Through Ireland by Robin Neillands, published in that halcyon year of 1994 when flannel shirts were all the rage and mobile phones were mere bricks. This book promises a thrilling jaunt across the verdant landscapes of the Emerald Isle, where sheep outnumber people and the only thing thicker than the fog is the accent of a local pub-goer after a few too many pints of Guinness.

Now, before you don your wellies and set off for the hills, consider that Neillands, with his expert wit and a healthy dose of irony, might just be leading you down a path less travelled—or at least one that’s strewn with the remnants of other more enthusiastic (and perhaps less sensible) walkers. One can only imagine the author, a man with both a sturdy pair of boots and a twinkle in his eye, wandering the rugged terrain, contemplating the existential crisis of choosing between a scone or a slice of soda bread at a quaint café, or maybe pausing to pet yet another uninterested sheep.

This book is brimming with the kind of minutiae that only true aficionados of footpaths and bogs could appreciate—an odyssey through both scenic vistas and the occasional boggy misstep. Expect to be regaled with tales of ancient ruins that seem to laugh at the futility of modernity, and landscapes that will leave you questioning your life choices—mostly why you didn’t just take a bus tour instead. After all, walking is just a fancy way of inviting blisters to your feet and sore muscles to your life.

The author’s prose is as lush as the Irish countryside itself. Each chapter is a delightful mixture of travelogue and philosophical musing, sometimes bordering on the absurd. You may find yourself wondering if you stumbled into an English class rather than a walking guide, as Neillands waxes poetic about the meaning of life, the importance of tea breaks, and the various shades of green that would confuse even the most committed Pantone enthusiast.

• Unravel the mysteries of Irish weather: Is it raining or merely considering it?
• Navigate the treacherous terrain of Irish pubs without losing your way home (or your dignity).
• Explore the art of dodging sheep while maintaining an air of nonchalance.
• Find out why every second sentence contains the words ’just’ or ’actually’.
• Survive the existential dread that comes with realizing you’ve become your parents—always checking the weather forecast.

Then there’s the delightful irony that this book, meant to inspire your own walking adventures, may very well leave you firmly planted on your sofa, wrapped in a blanket of existential dread, and contemplating whether it’s too late to cancel that trip to Ireland you had all but booked. But fear not! You can experience the adventure vicariously through the pages, complete with Neillands’s witty observations and dry humour, without the risk of wet socks or getting lost in a field of sheep.

Condition: This particular copy of Walking Through Ireland has seen better days. The cover may exhibit the kind of wear that makes it look like it has been through a battle with a particularly aggressive cup of tea, and the pages have been lovingly thumbed through, perhaps by someone who should have invested in a good pair of gloves. Yet, isn’t there something charming about a book that’s been loved, or at least mildly handled? It adds a certain je ne sais quoi to your bookshelf, as if you are inviting the spirit of adventure into your home, all while knowing full well you may never set foot in Ireland.

So, if you’re ready to take the plunge into the muddy but delightful world of Irish walks, all while curled up in your armchair, head over to Crappy Old Books and snag this worn but whimsical tome. Who knows? You might just find yourself planning that trip—if only to avoid blisters and sheep encounters for the foreseeable future.

Keep browsing: See more Travel books Other books by Robin Neillands